Day 60

I got the best advice from one of my friends today.
I was freaking about life, as per usual, and she gave me the weirdest analogy to calm me down but it actually made sense.

She said:

Your degree is like your baby.
I know, I know, wtf, right? but it’s true.
It takes like 9 semesters to get it (9 months)
You suffer through it and you throw up a lot…for very different reasons though.
But in the end, when you’re up there holding your degree/baby you’re fucking glad you did it anyway. And for the rest of your life, you’ll be glad you went through those 9 semesters because you built a whole life around it. So yeah dude, just suffer through it.

 

My degree is my baby and I’m in my first trimester. At least I get to drink

 

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Day 32

SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED.
First of all, my apologies to my readers…if I have any regular readers.

It was my birthday this weekend and the girls from my building threw me a surprise party. It was amazing, they took me to an arcade because I felt “old” and nothing says young like pizza, laser tag and go karts :).

I also came out to my best friend here. Let me tell you, right before I said the words: “I’m gay” I was a tangle of fear, nervousness, and doubt- however, 1.3 seconds later I was a bundle of joy, happiness, and emotion. My best friend was thankfully fine with it and so far nothing seems different. I never thought that two  words which are so simple could make me feel so liberated. I want to help other people feel the same way.

A year from now, I will be seated in front of my parents pronouncing those same two words. I really hope those words will have the same sweet taste as they nervously roll of my tongue a year from now.

Love and Peace,

Ellen

Day 15

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A licensed psychologist here is advertising homosexuality as a illness and claims to have a way to correct it. They were handing out these pamphlets by my campus

The paper reads:
“Do you suspect that your daughter, sister aunt is a lesbian. Does she:

  • Have short hair?
  • Dress like a man?
  • Go out with a lot of women?
  • Have failed relationships with the opposite sex?

WE CAN HELP YOU”

Let’s see how I did on that check list:

  • Have short hair?  NOPE!
  • Dress like a man?  sometimes…I wear baseball caps and flannel
  • Go out with a lot of women? Yeah
  • Have failed relationships with the opposite sex? Yeah, but I’ve also had successful ones

Let’s see how my sister (the straightest girl I know) did on the checklist

  • Have short hair? YUP
  • Dress like a man? NO
  • Go out with a lot of women? YEAH
  • Have failed relationships with the opposite sex? HELL YEAH

She scored better than me on that…should I be worried?

I’m very offended, the DSM-V doesn’t recognize homosexuality as an illness, she should know that.

Love and Peace,

Ellen

Day 12

I was gone for the weekend on a camping trip with the girls of my floor. It was amazing.
It is always funny to prank the girliest girl of the bunch when you’re in the middle of the forest.

I don’t know if this is a really bad lesbian stereotype but I was the only one who knew how to start a fire. I was also the first to set up my tent. I got a lot of “Wow, you’re so good at this” from the girls, which is lovely.

One night, the question ‘what would you do if you’re roomate was a lesbian?’ came up and I was surprised that most of the girls were fine with it. One was a very religious homophobe but that’s ok because we’re not that close. There was also a few who just ignored the question and just shook it off with a “dunno”. I’m waiting until we’ve reached a point in our friendship where they can’t just delete me from their lives in order to tell them I’m gay.

Anyway, tonight we’re watching the Lion King. It’s our last weekend where we’re all totally free. After this my diet is drastically going to increase its caffeine content to accomodate all of the scale models, CAD drafts, blue prints and drawings I’ll be working on.

Here’s to Corinthian columns,

Ellen

Day 8

Today I realized that the architects in my university have HUGE egos. I was not expecting that. Did I mention I study Architecture before?

I like to pretend that I’m the lesbian version of Ted Mosby. Come to think of it:

We both found a yellow umbrella. It has pretty cool story, I’ll post it another day

Mosby1

I have a pretty awesome set of friends…and even  one that reminds me of Barney

Also this literally happened to me today when I was writing an email

Mosby2

I get this feeling a lot:

Mosby 3

Lastly,

We both just want to fall madly in love with the woman of our dreams and can’t wait for that to happen

Peace and Love,

Lez Mosby

Day 7

I accidentally enrolled in  Bio-Climatic Design which is in Italian. I was tempted to change into the class in Spanish, but the professor is amazing. He says “merda” every two seconds and his email is 0es3yolo@.com which translates to “zero stress yolo”.

I will be adding a Help tab soon in Spanish. This is in case somebody wants to contact me to search for help dealing with their feelings or they simply just need someone to talk to. I know I definitely needed someone just to hear me out a few years ago, even if it was anonymously through the phone. I searched, I searched and I searched, but Mexico only has one suicide prevention contact center with a 1 800 and when I called, a woman picked up.

She was really nice to me…until I told her I was gay 😦

What if I had been suicidal?

Love and Peace,

Ellen